The Kind of Goal That Changes You

I’ve had a complicated relationship with goals.

For a long time, they felt rigid. What if I changed my mind? What if the goal didn’t fit me anymore before I reached the "end?" I’ve always been someone who leads in my own life more with intention and vision than with step-by-step structure. And that has served me very well.

But in the past year, I stretched my own thinking.

As you know, I signed up for a triathlon. A concrete, time-bound, scary goal, and one that I wasn't particularly excited about.

And yet that one decision shifted something big in me.

I've had so many surprise learnings from that experience, but one of the biggest was around how I think about goals, and who I have to become in order to reach them.

A friend of mine recently signed up for a 10k run to motivate herself to exercise more. But she didn’t train much, because it wasn’t scary enough. She knew she could do it. So she didn’t need to become someone different to make it happen.

That’s the difference.

Here’s what I’ve learned about goals:

SMART goals are fine, and they serve a purpose, but they can be ... tame. They’re tidy. Comfortable. But life, and growth, is rarely tidy or comfortable.

I believe in Big Audacious Goals that are a little wild. The kind that make your stomach flutter. Think: part magic wand, part dragon guarding the drawbridge (The magic says “What if this could happen?”; the dragon says “Only if you’re brave enough.”)

Next you layer in micro goals: realistic, tangible, doable steps that slowly build your belief and your momentum. These are the daily choices that shape your identity.

Fear is in service rather than a detriment. If you're a little nervous, good! It wakes you up. It means something is at stake. It makes you commit.

Accountability matters. Not just for the big goal, but for the tiny ones along the way. The ones you’d skip if no one was watching.

A coach helps. Not just with tools and strategies, but with uncovering and naming what’s in your way: old stories, limiting beliefs, sneaky voices in your head whispering, “Who do you think you are?” "You're not smart enough." "Or fit enough."

And maybe most importantly:

A goal isn’t just about what you accomplish. It’s about who you become.

That’s what makes it worth doing.

I have more goals on my radar: a mix of vision, intention, and yes, magic-wand-meets-dragon audacity.

If you’re working toward something big, or wondering what your next big stretch might be, I’d love to help you hold that vision, break it down, and walk with you through the becoming. Let’s talk.